Содержание
Каламбуры на английском языке для школьных уроков.
Смешные каламбуры — Funny Puns
- How should you greet the person who invented zero?
Thank you for Nothing. - What do you call a five sitting on clouds? A High-five
- What are the favorite tunes of the planets? Nep-tunes
- Would February March? No, But April May.
- Why does a skeleton not like recess? Because it has no Body to play with
- When does an astronaut eat? At Launch time
- How did one pencil compliment the other? You look sharp!
- What did the right eye say to the left eye? There is something between us, and it smells.
- Why do police officers like to play baseball? Because they want to get a catch
- How is the forest? It’s un-be-leaf-able!
- What does a tree wear before going to the swimming pool? Swimming trunks
- What is an Easter play called? Eggs-tra curricular activity
- Why was the student studying on the terrace? To have a higher education
- What’s wrong with the math book? It is full of problems
- Why did the boy not use the computer? He feared it would byte him.
- Why does Alice keep asking so many questions? Because Alice is in Wonderland
- Name the most musical bone. Trombone
- What has wheels and flies? A garbage truck
- Why are the elevator jokes so good? Because they go through many levels
- Why did the old man fall into the well? Because he didn’t see that well
Каламбуры на день рождения — Birthday Puns
- How do pickles celebrate birthdays? They relish the moment.
- What goes up but never comes down? Age
- Which music scares birthday balloons? Pop music
- Why do we place candles at the top of cakes? Because they can’t be placed at the bottom
- Why do our relatives never forget our birthdays? Because age is just a relative thing
- Why are people always warm on their birthdays? Because everyone toasts them
- Where can you find a birthday gift for your cat? At the catalog
- What did the elephant want on its birthday? A trunk filled with gifts
- Why do cats like to celebrate birthdays? Because cats love to Purrrrrrty!
- What is served at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake.
- How do cats wish each other on their birthdays? Have a pawsome birthday!
- How did the other animals wish the parrot on its birthday? Happy bird-day
- What does a cat eat on its birthday? A mice-cream
- How did the other animals wish the dinosaur on its birthday? You’re pretty dino-mite! Happy birthday!
- What does a snowman like on its birthday cake? The ice-ing
- What do you say to a female sheep on her birthday? Happy birthday to ewe!
- Why do the birthday candles never exercise? Because they burn out quickly
- How should you wish a tree on its birthday? Sappy birthday!
- How should you wish your goldfish on its birthday? Wish you a Fin-tastic day!
- Why did the teddy bear not eat the birthday cake? Because it was already stuffed
- Why do owls never exchange birthday gifts? Because they never give a hoot!
Каламбуры на английском языке про еду — Food Puns
- What is the difference between a pancake and a waffle? A waffle is a pancake but with abs.
- What would you do if a lemon gets sick? Give it a lemon aid
- How does a pizza introduce itself? Slice to meet you
- How do you fix a broken tomato? By using tomato paste
- Where do the pepperonis go for their vacation? To the Leaning Tower of Pizza
- What is a sleeping pizza called? A Pizzzzzzzzzza
- What does a hot dog say to a sourdough? You are my true roll model.
- What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles
- What is the other name for a violent breakfast? Cereal killer
- What did the banana ask its sick friend? How are you peeling, my friend?
- Which veggie looks after the elderly? The carrot-aker
- Which candy is always late? The Choco-late
- When should a cookie go to the doctor? When it feels crummy
- Why does the yogurt love to go to the museum? Because the yogurt is cultured
- Why can’t eggs tell jokes? Because they will crack each other
- Why did the tomatoes blush? They saw the salad dressing.
- Why do the French like snails? Because they don’t like fast food
- How do you make a walnut laugh? By cracking it up
- How do you make a milkshake? By giving it a good scare
- What does a piece of bread say to the other? You are my butter half.
- What should you say to an avocado in the morning? Avo good day!
Каламбуры на английском языке про животных — Animal Puns
- What do you call an alligator with a vest? An Investigator
- Why did the spider turn on the computer? To check its website
- Why do cows have bells? Because their horns don’t work
- What would you call a horse that lives near you? A neigh-bor
- Why do horses have a great physique? Because they take a Stable diet
- How does a dog take a break in the middle of a movie? By pressing Paws
- What did the dinosaurs use for their bathroom decoration? Reptiles
- What do you call a dinosaur with good vocabulary? A Thesaurus
- Why are leopards bad at playing hide and seek? Because they always get spotted
- What is a toothless bear called? A Gummy bear
- Why do hummingbirds hum all the time? Because they have forgotten the words
- How do cows entertain themselves? By watching Moo-vies
- Which animal needs wigs? The bald eagle
- What should you do if a dog chews a dictionary? Take the words out of its mouth.
- Where does a mouse park its boat? At the Hickory Dickory Dock
- Where does a sheep go on a vacation? Baaaahamas
- What is a thief alligator call? A Crook-o-dile
- What did the Dalmatian say after lunch? That hit the spot!
- Which day is the most fearful day for a chicken? A Fry-day
- What is a well-read cat’s favorite book? Of Mice and Men
- What does a dog say after sitting on sandpaper? It’s Rufff.
- Where do the polar bears go for voting? Answer: The North Poll